Wednesday, 6 August 2008

First time in Sports Café

So it’s a Tuesday. I haven’t made any plans to meet up with anyone this evening, but the beauty of the LSS means that someone has put up a post inviting everyone out. There’s a bit of a risk with these things due to intimidation and how well I’ll get on with the guys but I decide to go anyway.

I meet up with Christian, the organiser, and the first thing that strikes me is that he has a crazy moustache! It’s not every day that you see a hairy lip like that! Anyway we meet up with a bunch of other people and go to the venue. Over the next few minutes the group seems to increase non stop until there’s about ten of us. Then I get a message from Jason who was with me on the bootcamp I did on Saturday. Turns out he’s in the same venue. I go and meet him and he’s with about five other guys as well! The night is turning into a monster!

To be honest the venue isn’t at its best. It’s not that busy and there are more guys than girls. Apparently normally (during term time) there are more girls than guys, and it’s very busy.

At this stage in the evening there’s only one group of three girls and so Jason and I go and approach them. Jason opens them and they’re really friendly, they’re celebrating quitting their jobs as bartenders. Jason dominates initially, he can talk the hind legs off a horse, so I’m just sticking in there. We sit down eventually. After a while I manage to split off one of the girls so I can talk to her and leave Jason to talk to everyone else. I start talking about normal stuff but quickly manage to move it on to more interesting topics of conversation like travelling, hopes and dreams and so on.

It’s going well but then the main girl that Jason’s speaking to splits off and then distracts my girl and kind of cuts us out in a way. I think Jason had just been spitting game and hadn’t progressed the conversation to more comfort type stuff. Either way we’re out of there.

Later we go and talk to three more girls by a window, and we’re getting no joy from them. Within a minute a couple of guys come back from the bar to join them, so it’s clear why. We eject; that’s just the way it is!

With Christian we open a large group of Americans. He puts his foot in it by asking some Asian girls if they’re sisters – it comes across like he’s saying they all look the same, which doesn’t go down well! I change tack as quickly as I can, and end up doing the American state capitals routine, which is just a small DHV but quite fun. The most difficult one was Maine, which is Augusta. But there’s too many of them for us to hold their attention and we kinda lost it from the start.

One interesting thing that Christian tells me about himself is that about four years ago he went out sarging for the first time with some of the guys that are now the top PUAs in the UK, London Soul being the only one that I can remember now but there were others. But he was there when they were all chumps, and now they are gods amongst men (or rather top instructors for the larger companies). Christian didn’t focus on sarging as much as them over that period so he is still at a basic level. But it shows what can be achieved. Have faith in the process.

After that I get talking to one of Jason’s friends who can’t open, trying to get him to. I can’t help him but I inadvertently get myself out of state so I find it hard to open. We move to the dancefloor and I’m just not feeling it, so I check out a bit early. It’s a bit lame of me, and I could have easily spent another half an hour getting into state and having a bit of dance. Lesson learned.

On Monday I met up with Paul who does NLP training and he encouraged me to review sarging sessions using the following format, so here it is:

What did I do well?

  • Stayed in set with the bartender girls even though I felt like ejecting and had a good conversation with one of them for a good while, not just normal conversation, talking about life and dreams and so on.
What could I do better next time?

  • Open more sets, not get so in my head after talking to people who can’t open.
  • I should have had more physical contact with the bartender girls.
  • Stick in with the dancefloor game instead of going home.
What did I do well that I haven’t done before?

  • Nothing specific other than going to Sports Café and meeting up with about 20 new wings that I haven’t met before.

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