Thursday, 24 July 2008

Alex Descends into Hell for a Bottle of Milk

So by Saturday I’ve finished the weed which is a huge relief. I meet up with Peter and Jordan who as ever wants to go to On Anon. Well I haven’t been there in a while so I suppose I can put up with it for one night to see if it has changed at all.

Well this night it’s busier that I remember it was when we were last there, which is a good thing. However the fact remains that the quality is very low. For every hot chick there’s about ten that are nothing to text home about.

Either way before we get there Peter tells me about an awesome little opener: Pirates versus Ninjas. I don't know what his opener was but I made my own: What would you rather be, a Ninja or a Pirate? From that I can go into the benefits of both - Ninjas would win the fight and have a cooler outfit, Pirates have the wine, women and song and travel the world (and sodomy). I’m reading a book on history at the moment and it points out that the British Empire was formed from piracy (i.e. looting the Spanish). So they’re empire builders as well. However I didn’t know that then and I probably wouldn’t mention it while I’m chatting someone up…

So I’m on a roll with this opener. I use other ones as well but this one is the most fun. I open an HB6 with it and move on to Daleks versus Cybermen. She thinks Daleks are too scary, which is cute. I stay talking to her for some time which is good. She’s a nice girl though not too hot. I don’t feel anything in particular for her but she’s interested in me.

I ask for her number but she honestly doesn’t know it. So I respond with the classic “What’s the best way to keep in contact with you?” She tells me to put my number in her phone, which I do. Two number closes in three days. They don’t really mean anything but they’re reaching my goals and they’re like warm up sets so it’s OK. At least I’m escalating to a close of some sort.

I am largely of the theory that numbers don’t mean shit. That’s not completely true but kissing is better and fucking is what it’s all about anyway. But it’s a step in the right direction and that’s what this is all about – progress.

I meet up with a new guy Tom who’s Aussie and I get on well with him. We terrorise the club a bit. Upstairs I get a drink from the bar and open two girls next to me with Pirates versus Ninjas. They go to sit down once they have their drinks while I wait for mine. Tom reckons we should reopen them, so as they both chose Pirates I suggest that as he’s dressed in black he opens with “I come from a long line of Australian Ninjas and you have offended me, my family and my shaolin temple.” I think that’s awesome. Anyway we reopen and have a chat with the girls. They’re not really into us massively though they are talking. I can’t really hear what’s being said anyway. We stick in for a fair amount of time though. But the girls aren’t that exciting even though one of them is a 7.5 / 8 so we eventually eject.

After a while we’re running out of steam so I decide to call it a night. As I pick up my bag I thought I heard Tom say that there’s some hot girls nearby. I decide to open them with Pirates versus Ninjas, and I’m halfway through the opener when I realise that it’s the set we’d just opened! It’s hilarious and we all have a good laugh – well me and Tom anyway! Turns out he said it was the same girls, not what I thought he said.

Things I’ve learnt:

  • A lot of girls have low value for me, i.e. they’re not hot enough or they’re not interesting enough. Not sure what to make of that. I am coming to realise that my standards are a lot higher than most peoples’, and maybe that’s holding me back a bit.
  • When I can get to use my surreal humour in sets it’s the most fun for me.
  • I am sticking in with sets for longer instead of just ejecting
  • I am number closing on a more regular basis.
  • I need to have a few DHV routines down to help with staying in set after the opener. At the moment it seems like I’ll have to add in opener after opener rather than DHVs.
  • Tom’s a great guy but not available for day game unfortunately.

No comments: