I Take Two Steps Forward, You Take Two Steps Back

So arrangements are made to meet Liam and Peter in Hoxton. My flatmate is meeting a friend in a bar nearby so I bring her along with me. We’re a bit late but I eventually meet them in Ziegfried. While my flatmate’s there it’s a bit hard to open as (a) I have to look after her a bit – I can’t cut conversation and open as that will just look weird and (b) my flatmates know nothing about this and I don’t want them too in case they think it’s a bit lame (one of my flatmates is a super-natural).

Funnily at one point my flatmate asks me how I know Peter and Liam. “Oh, I met them on an internet forum about how you learn to pick up chicks. Yes, I’m 32 and still lame at that!” No, I didn’t say that – I used my normal line of how I met them through another friend, which always seems to work.

Anyway after a while her friend turns up and she happens to be a hot Indian chick. Interesting! I’ll have to ask her to invite her around sometime! Shortly afterwards they both leave and we’re left to our own devices. The venue’s pretty crowded but there’s not many chicks, and they generally aren’t that hot. Oh yeah, an old work colleague was there. Liam points to the set that she’s in, but no, probably not a good idea to open them I think!

So upstairs is pretty crap so Liam and I head downstairs while Pete’s in set. I spot a group of four girls looking at me – I’m wearing a mildly interesting shirt so I guess they’re looking at that (well. either that, or how amazingly hot I am…!). It’s enough of a MASSIVE IOI for me to go and approach them. “Hi” I say, as I haven’t really thought of an opener, and don’t really need to since I know they’ve been looking at me.

I approach with a smile on my face and good confidence and that’s all I need to se the tone of the interaction, and they respond positively.

Again I don’t really remember what I say after that but we have a chat, we talk about my shirt (they confirm that they were looking at it) and I get to know them. Liam joins and as I introduce him to them it kind of blows the set apart and I’m left talking to Liam! Oh well.

I then spend the next few minutes trying to get Liam to open. It doesn’t work. Shortly afterwards Pete rejoins us and we decide to move on.

We go to Light and although there’s a fair few people there, there aren’t many obvious sets. Pete opens some drunk girls and seems to have a good interaction with them. But nothing’s taking my fancy. Then Grieg calls and he ends up joining us.

Once he’s here we of course get into our ridiculous banter and that’s good fun but there’s no sarging. Liam decides to go home, and given that there aren’t many options in the venue we go to the Big Chill again.

When we arrive there, Grieg immediately goes into a set of guys (…!) and Pete ends up talking to SuperLanks and his girlfriend (as well as another girl who he games I think) and I’m left on my own.

For some reason my state has completely crashed. Everyone seems to be chatting except me, and I start to feel like shit. I look around for a set to open but I can’t see anything and can’t seem to find the motivation. I’m totally in my head and it’s an unwelcome reminder of how I was before, and how I imagine Liam is at the moment. Damn, it’s annoying.

Anyway I need to do something and Grieg’s flatmates plus some friends are here as well, so I start talking to one of them, who turns out to be a friend of Grieg’s Aussie flatmate.

Grieg’s flatmates are pretty cool and I’ve always sort of felt intimidated by them, which is totally my belief and not reality. I always deal with these situations by trying to make friends with them so as to disprove my belief. So that’s exactly what I do. I have a chat with Sam, Greig’s ex-flatmate who is a fairly hot chick. I have a good convo with her though she’s high energy and I’m not as much. I briefly talk to his Argentian flatmate and then finally to the Aussie guy, who it turns out works in the same industry as me.

I’ve heard Greig talk about him before as he’s pretty “alpha,” and he is: tall, good looking and peacocked with fashionable dress and a crazy Shoreditch haircut. Nevertheless I have a chat with him and it’s all good.

By then it’s time to go home so I say goodbye to the people I’ve just made friends with and make a move. A partial recovery from my unexpected state crash.

Thoughts

I think we were a bit unlucky tonight as there weren’t that many sets to open.

However more importantly I started off the evening fairly well but then (strangely after bantering with Grieg for a while) my state completely evaporated and I couldn’t open. I felt intimidated by the people around me, I felt low value and afraid of getting blown out.

I couldn’t snap straight out of it so I did the next best thing – talked to people to oil the wheels of sociability. It was better than nothing.

Looking back on it I find it hard to understand why I was like that, I haven’t been like that for a while. I guess it’s like investing money, your net worth may increase over time but sometimes you’ll have days where it goes down. The next time it won’t be like that.